Do you know how to find balance in Motherhood?

What does it mean to find balance in motherhood? First, we must address what it means to find balance.

Balance– a condition in which different elements are equal or in the correct proportions.

I like that this definition says, “correct proportions.” A proportion is basically a part of a whole. The takeaway from that, is in order to find balance, you must prioritize the parts in relation to the whole. I wrote a post giving tips on prioritizing daily tasks that is a good starting point to find balance.

Finding balance in motherhood means the different elements (i.e. your roles as a mother) are in the correct proportions in relation to you as a whole person. Those elements/roles can’t be equal, but you can prioritize them and adjust them in a way that makes your daily life function effectively.

6 simple tips to help find balance in motherhood

1. Learn to say “No”

This statement has no grey areas or explanation. Mama, you are one person, and you cannot do it all. You will be surprised the extra hours you will gain back in a day by simply saying “no.”

This means sometimes you will have to say “no” to the teacher asking you to help out at your child’s school. “No” to the mom asking you to carpool, “no” to your friends who insist on you coming to lunch, “no” to your kids and even to your spouse or partner. There will even be a line you must draw, as to when you will say “no” to your employer. I can’t list all the reasons you may need to say no, or all the people you will have to turn down. The point is, in order to find balance in motherhood, you can’t commit yourself to too many things.

2. Adjust your expectations

This is hard. This is one of the biggest reasons we as mother’s have a hard time finding balance. There is a difference in lowering expectations and adjusting them. This requires you to re-evaluate your expectations to determine how realistic they are. What you are expecting for yourself, your children, your spouse, your parents, your child’s teacher? Here is a great article I read that will help you re-evaluate your expectations.

There is so much pressure on us mother’s, sometimes setting certain expectations is a way to cope with our many responsibilities. However, it is important to give yourself grace and realize how unrealistic some of these expectations are. Not to say you won’t need to make sacrifices, or that some high expectations aren’t necessary…just saying, adjust where you can.

3. Get your kids on a sleep schedule

Notice I said sleep schedule and not “bedtime.” This is because I mean a schedule based on wake-up time, naps, and bedtime. This of course must be tailored to your own family and the schedule’s you may have. However, having a sleep schedule makes a huge difference.

A sleep schedule not only establishes a healthy bedtime routine, but it also helps create good sleep habits. That being said, this helps set boundaries for you. It allows you to “put off” certain things until the kids are asleep. Or getting things done before they wake up.

The more consistent you are with a sleep schedule, the better you will be able to balance motherhood.

You want to anticipate the time your child gets up daily and base your entire sleep schedule on their wake time.

This article has excellent visuals to help determine wake time between naps, as well as bedtime per age. CLICK HERE

4. Create a visual

This can mean whatever you need it to mean. It can be as basic as a monthly calendar, or as elaborate as a picture schedule broken down by hour. Some kids adjust better to transitions during the day, by being able to visually see what comes next.

This can be helpful as an adult as well. Seeing what comes next in your day, week, month…can help you stay focused and on track with your responsibilities. This allows you the flexibility to prioritize based on your schedule.

You can also make a visual of routines. Kids will benefit from a “bedtime routine” posted, or even a chore chart. My family keeps our weekly menu for breakfast, lunch and dinner on the refrigerator.

Even if this means sticky note affirmations on your mirror. Create a visual that helps keep you balanced.

5. Shop for groceries online

This has been a life saver for me in so many ways. Grocery shopping can be so challenging. By doing it online, you can keep track of coupons, your list, your budget, and your menu…all at your fingertips. We use Kroger for our weekly groceries, Target for our non-food grocery items, and Amazon for bulk items.

Most stores offer annual subscriptions, that allow for free grocery delivery. In addition to this, many allow trial periods that will allow you to see if this works for your family. We save so much time shopping this way. My husband and I both have the apps on our phones, and just add items throughout the week. This helps us also keep a running total, making sure we stay in budget.

I have a listing in my ETSY shop for a comprehensive grocery list that is very helpful while online shopping.

6. Teach your kids to self entertain

I recently wrote a post about ways to keep your children entertained while you work. Finding engaging activities, that your child can do independently (or with help from a sibling) is key. You also want to give them activities that have clear directions and are easy to take out and put away.

Some examples of center ideas:

• Library (quiet reading)
• Legos/Blocks
• puzzles
• play-doh (and tools and mats also)
• Kinetic sand
• Magnet Tiles
• sensory tables
• listening center (radio, computer, tablets, stories, etc.)
• cubes
• lacing shapes
• busy boards/busy bags

I also gave suggestions of open-ended or dramatic play, arts and crafts, technology, and chores. Helping your children become independent in keeping themselves occupied, allows you more time and freedom to balance being their mother. You can read the whole post HERE if you need more ideas.

Balancing motherhood is the idea of juggling things around, to make life work. Whether you are intending to or not, every day you are balancing motherhood. That’s basic survival. This is to help you do it more successfully.

The beauty, as well as challenge, of motherhood…is nothing is constant. It is always changing, which means you will have to continue changing as well.

As always, I would love to hear your feedback and suggestions!

Surviving the day,

Erica